Wot as apend to the standerds of inglish are schools r prodewsing?

I’ve just received an application from a student looking to work in the media and I am frankly so staggered at the errors contained in the materials he’s sent that I feel the need to share this with you.

Obviously, I’m not going to identify him [other than to say that English is indeed his first language] but here are a few examples:

“I hope that with a small position at your company, I will not only increase my experience in this sector, but I would also hope that my employment would also ease the workload for the other employees.”

“I believe in my capacity as a student, volunteer and worker I have demonstrated many of the qualities so richly sort after …” [He obviously has something against the word ‘that’. Also, this is taken from a paragraph which is in fact a single 84-word sentence].

“This being the industry primary structured around public opinions I believe …” [This is taken from a paragraph where in a very, very long sentence with several sub-clauses he never actually explains what he believes].

In his work experience section, he says a benefit of working in one establishment was “experiencing different people” [I know what he means but there is a better way of putting it] and in another practicing good customer relations.

And in his personal statement he says: “I consider myself to be a hard worker and a keen learner, taking an avid enthusiasm in solving any problem that may arise and not quitting until it has been solved. I easily pick up skills and am a fast learner.” He’s obviously not learnt about avoiding repetition yet.

However, perhaps most surprising was the page listing his qualifications. He says he got an A* for English Literature and an A for English in his GCSEs, although he did get a more realistic B in English Lit AS/A2. He also revealed he is one of the lucky students to find a place at a university taking – of course – a BA (Hons) in English. We can only hope that he learns a bit more about the language before he finds a job working in the media that he says he loves.

It seems any further comment on the standards that our education system is currently working to would be superfluous but please feel free to tell us what you think, especially if you believe that I’m being too harsh or pedantic.